The MBR25 Finals in Pro Wrestling Style Promo

[The camera opens inside a packed arena.]

Laurine stands in the middle of the ring, wearing a sharp business suit, microphone in hand. The crowd buzzes with anticipation.

Laurine:
I have beaten each and every one of the top busty girls BoobsRealm has put in front of me. Mysti C. Bailey Moon. The infamous Robin Grey. And a long list of others who thought they were ready.

I am your current Miss BoobsRealm Champion.

And after this Sunday, I will become the first woman in history to win Miss BoobsRealm three times in a row — three years straight — with no VPN cheating, as Tessa, no excuses.

In fact, not only without fans rallying behind me… but despite fans rallying against me.

I am the best there was, the best there is, and the best there ever will be.

This MBR25 Final will crown me as the GOAT… and there is no one who can prevent…

🎵 “Kingdom” by Downstait hits 🎵

The crowd erupts.

[Gretta Grand appears on the stage — the “Booby Rhodes” of the Boobs Community.]

🎵
Adrenaline in my soul
Every fight out of control
Do it all to get them off their feet
Crowd is here, about to blow
Waiting for me to start the show
Out the curtain, lights go up — I’m home!
🎵

Gretta storms to the ring and gets nose-to-nose with Laurine.

Gretta Grand:
I was in the back listening to all your crap, hoping it wasn’t really you out here acting like this. But sadly, I realized it was.

The only thing missing from this ring right now… are your boobs.

Laurine’s face hardens.

Laurine:
Excuse me, little girl — what was your name again?

Gretta opens her mouth.

Laurine:
Don’t bother. I know you’re Gretta… something.

Gretta:
Unlike you, I know exactly who you are. And you’re not Laurine.

Laurine looks confused.

Gretta:
Nope. You’re not Laurine. Your real name is La Urine.

The crowd gasps.

Gretta:
Because you pissed all over the fans who supported you all these years. And not just them — you pissed all over us.

The women who grind day in and day out, busting our asses making content. I work almost every day. I talk to fans. I listen. I take requests.

While you only “worked” whenever you felt like taking a few pictures with your friend on a random weekend.

Laurine:
That’s true. I didn’t need to spend hours in front of a camera to make pennies.
I just happened to look better than all of you.

Gretta:
I am so sorry that I’m going to knock you off your pedestal in this Final.
Sadly for you, you don’t have airbags anymore to cushion the fall.

Laurine:
You’re funny. You should try comedy — after the fans move on to the next girl next year.

Gretta:
Wrong. Wrong. Wrong.
I will beat you this year… and I will win next year too.

Laurine:
Wake up. You’re only popular because you look like me.
You’ve got my hair. Boobs almost like mine. You’re slim like me.

Wait — it just dawned on me.
You’re a Laurine wannabe.

You’re Temu Laurine.

Gretta:
I’m the upgrade, сука!

Laurine pauses, visibly offended, taking a deep breath.

Laurine:
Accept it. I will win MBR25, and you will just have to learn to live as second best.

Gretta:
I will beat you — because you disrespected all of us.

I missed classes. Lost sleep. Skipped birthdays. Lost money — all to work on cam. I’ve worked my ass off for over two years for this moment.

And listen carefully… because this Sunday, it won’t just be Laurine versus Gretta Grand…

Gretta looks to the side.

At ringside, Sohelia Clifford is seated, casually eating popcorn, holding a Money in the Bank briefcase.

Gretta (continuing):
This Sunday… it will be Laurine versus the entire Big Boobs Community.

Laurine:
Listen, Gretta. I will win MBR25.
And if I somehow lose — I’m retired anyway.

But what about you? This year will be your third attempt.

I retire as the only woman to never lose a Miss BoobsRealm competition.
If I lose, I walk away a legend.

But if you lose again?
That’s three losses.

That makes you just another cam girl with big boobs.

And in reality… you’ll be losing the three years I won.
Which means — you’ll always be my bitch.

Gretta snaps, ready to attack—

—BUT—

Sohelia Clifford slides into the ring from behind, raising the Money in the Bank briefcase, about to strike…

AND—